We didn’t leave port until nearly 11pm. I know this because we’d not long gone to sleep when we were woken by a tannoy announcement and the captain doing his ‘this is what the emergency alarm sounds like’ speech again. The ship had taken on 800 passengers in Tenerife (there are 1400 in total out of a possible 1800) but quite a few had been very late boarding. I’d spoken to a member of staff earlier who was sat at a muster station and who gives out cabin cards to new arrivals. She told me that Manchester airport were very late and they always are because it’s a shit airport (I’m paraphrasing).
Our sailing was another rough one but not as bad as the night before. We had swaying but no shuddering. I think we can assume they’re all going to be rough so I won’t mention it again unless we do a ‘Poseidon Adventure’ in which case I’ll probably take on the role of ‘man who doesn’t listen and goes the wrong way’.
We got into Lanzarote by 11am, quite late in our experience, and then jumped on a coach to go to Playa Blanca Market and do some retail therapy. We’d been on the ship for nearly 48 hours and apart from buying a jumper for the volcano trip that she ended up not needing, all Lyn had spent was €4 on a fridge magnet (your welcome Victoria) and she was ‘jones’in’ for some tat.
My first impression of Lanzarote or ‘Lands a Grotty’ as all the cool kids call it is that it’s a brown and black hell scape. The myriad of volcanic hills remind me of the rotting tombs of a now extinct race of giants who’s hubris so offended the Gods they devastated the island ensuring that any life that might survive or grow would install a sense of pity and revulsion into anyone who saw it. But that’s just what I think.
On a similar note our tour didn’t live up to expectations either. The ‘market’ at Playa Blanca is supposed to happen twice a week. Instead of going straight to it Lyn and I, thinking we were being smart, decided to get some food first not wanting to get caught out like we did yesterday. By the time we got to the market an hour later they were packing up. From what was left we didn’t miss much. We still had 2 hours to kill.
We sat in the shade of a tree. Lyn noticed an Albino lady with a pram sat at table in a nearby cafe. For some reason this amused her and led to a bit of speculation. Eventually as we were only about 10 meters away I said ‘Can you stop saying albino. If the wind changes direction she might hear you.’ Lyn said “What should I say?” I replied ‘I don’t know, say rabbit’ Lyn then announced in a far too loud a voice ‘I went to school with a rabbit’… We moved on and got an ice cream.
As we were getting back on the bus Lyn thought she heard someone saying that the market would be opening back up again soon. That sounded about right, a 2 hour siesta because it’s Spain. Seems obvious now but a bit of warning would have been helpful but probably wouldn’t have changed the result. I‘d say ‘go to hell Lanzarote’ but you’re already there.
P.S. If Lanzarote is a favourite of yours don’t take the post to harshly. I’m sure it has its charms it’s just not for us.
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